Merry Christmas?

I hope that all of you had at least a fair Christmas. Mine was fair at best. Not horrible. There was some niceness but it was mostly from my girlfriend Russ and his family. I hope that they accept me still even thought I will most likely never turn gay and deflower their father. There is just some bridges that I will never cross. As for the home life, nothing better at Christmas like a good cold shoulder. I wish that people would hide their true feelings from me especially when they are negative in nature. I do my best not to share them with you. Sometimes I slip and curse and rant but I don't mean to do it. I just feel like for that instance you deserve to see my frustration. Don't worry, you can punish me endlessly and I will welcome the opportunity to let you back into my good graces when you are able to participate in normal healthy interaction. I look forward to when my memory fails me so that I can forget my life. Now that is a little sharp but who cares about me anyway. Oh, well. I am not going to let it ruin my day or even my minute. Being alone in a marriage has its advantages anyway. You know what the future will be. The joy that you will have in your life will be of your own creation. If you want to know what you do wrong you will and if you do everything correct you may achieve silence, at least they are not complaining. Oh well, Why do we spoil children and forgive their transgressions where as adults we are keeping score of everything that happens. Do we not appreciate that this life is temporary short time. I know that I can forgive but even that is lonely. I sometime wish that I could be a simpler person and just not think of such things but if I was then I would not be Bob. If anyone thinks that I am self pitying I may be, but say it to my face and see what you get. Just consider this another method of masturbation and then it may make sense. I have discovered recently what else does offend me. I will not reveal it as it will make it easier for those to do so. Oh well, I have work to do. Oh by the way, don't engage in political debate or rhetoric if you cant take any criticism. Just keep your fragile views to yourself.